The Real Dream Life

I've realized lately...although I suppose I always knew it...I am a dreamer. 

I dream of restoring a huge, old farm house to fit the modern country decor I love so much.

I dream of having the time and talent to keep a garden so I could eat fresh veggies all summer and then some.

I dream of making beautiful pies and learning to be a multitasker so I can make a whole meal at once without freaking out and burning everything.

I dream of my house being a home.  Where people are free to gather and catch a breath while feeling welcomed and taken care of. 

I dream of hosting hayrides for family and friends and Valentine's Day parties for young single ladies.

I dream of spending my evenings taking walks and sipping sweet tea on the front porch swing. 

I dream of days spent more simply.  Working hard and sleeping soundly.  Enjoying relationships and hands-on projects instead of running all over the place from one event to the next to the next.

I know, I know, I'm old fashioned!  And it doesn't bother me a bit :)

But those things are all down the road a ways.  And I do have other dreams...bigger ones, I think, for this less settled phase of my life...

I'd love to take a road trip out West! See the Grand Canyon and the mountains of Montana with my siblings...is that still West? haha, geography has never been my strong suit :)

I'd love to go on missions over seas and hold a lonely child in my arms, reminding him that he's terribly loved. 

I'd love to go wind surfing and zip lining and on a hot air balloon and a sleigh ride!!

And when I'm old...my friends and I have a genius plan for when we're all still alive and our husbands are gone!

The plan then is to have a mansion in Colorado.  The house will be full of windows that overlook our lake.  We'll have an art studio full of natural light and a cozy breakfast nook, a wood stove and maybe a nice neighbor boy we can make cookies for for when he's done chopping our fire wood. A huge ramp for mattress surfing, and beautiful homey decorations. We, of course, plan on being crazy old grandma's who still go fishing and ride 4-wheelers and race our wheel chairs!  ...Don't worry, we realize how unrealistic this is! But you gotta give us props for this one :)

I have no idea how my life will actually turn out...if there's one thing that's become certain to me, it's the unpredictability of life.  And I've discovered that the busier my life gets, the more I dream about the one described above.  To me, life is a crazy mix of learning how to step forward, to take action so that my future is one I want to live with, and enjoying the present moment all at the same time.  I'm learning to be thankful for the new opportunities God gives me and to cherish the memories I already have. 

Like the song says, "Life's a dance we learn as we go. Sometimes we lead, sometimes we follow. Don't worry 'bout what you don't know, life's a dance we learn as we go."   And so, I keep going, twirling, and dipping, stepping on a few toes, and learning a lift or two.

I'm learning that this has to be my own, unique dance.  ...This gets to be my own, unique dance.  I don't have to fit into a mold, trying to mimic another's style of movement or song.  God has created me to be me, not another dancer I admire.  Sometimes I try to be someone I'm not, but it never ends well.  It only leads to frustration and disappointment. 

I guess you could say I've been through a bit of an identity crisis.  For a time, stupid ol' Satan wiggled his way in, and I lost sight of the fact that who I am in Christ and the way He's made me is enough.  Worse than that, I forgot who that person was all together.  I was so lost in what I thought I was supposed to be for the world that God's voice, reminding me that I'm His child--loved and protected and beautiful and...simply enough--was lost in the hurt and confusion.

I struggled with all of this for some time here recently.  I let my mind dwell on what I'm not instead of who I am and who I can be with God's power in me.  And I don't think I'm the only one who has this problem from time to time.

I'm so very grateful for the people who helped pull me out of this awful state of mind and spirit!  Yes, grasping the good is still a process, but we're getting there.  A dear friend--one of those Godly women who has poured herself into me more than she'll ever know--gave me this illustration:  Sometimes, we find ourselves in a hole, and being the "fixers" that we are, we try digging ourselves out, making the hole bigger as we claw and try doing it all on our own.  Sometimes, I think we need to be momentarily ok with the rut we're in--to say, "you know what? today I did a horrible job with my devotions! but it's ok" Because when we do that, it allows us to focus on the good.  We've recognized the issue, and it calms us down long enough for us to grasp God's hand as He offers help, instead of trying to fix it on our own. 

That wasn't exactly what she said, but it's what I got out of it, and it has helped so much! ...that, and some tears, angry words, and a hug from my sister, and dear Jason giving me orders to stop worrying about what other people think of me :) 

Honesty with others gets me through a lot these days.  ...No one can help if they don't know where you're wounded the most deeply.  And the secret seems to be exposing those hurts before they become scabs, ugly and scarring. 

Words cannot describe how much I feel for those of you lovely readers out there who don't feel like you have that person you can pour your heart out to.  The other half of this journey has been learning to let God be enough.  To be so real with Him that it's almost ridiculous.  But hey, He knows it all anyway, so why not pour my guts out, right?! And I'm learning to let Him hold me. To speak to me directly through His word, and not just through other people.  Trust me, when given the chance, He will speak so clearly it cannot be missed.  ...Do we give Him the chance He deserves?

Well. There I've gone on quite the bunny trail again! In short, I'm learning to look forward to the mystery that is my future while embracing the beauty of the present.  I find myself in bad moods far more often than I'd like, but I also find myself being refined day by day, moment by moment. 

I don't always get it right, but His grace is sufficient for me--in times of hurt and failure, disbelief and wandering.  And for that, I'm eternally grateful. 

The Evidence Room

The other day, I was watching one of the millions of crime shows on TV.  It talked about how the evidence from a crime is never really gotten rid of.  It just sits there and piles up.  I don't know if that's true or not, but that with some other recent events got me thinking...

Is there evidence that I have touched other people's lives?

If spreading the fingerprints of Christ were a crime, would I have been arrested more times than I can count?

Do my words and actions towards other people make a lasting impression on who that person is and becomes? Or am I just another face in the crowd because I never took the time to invest in another's life?

...If I died while those I did life with are still alive, would my facebook wall be flooded with accounts of the differences, or at least impressions, that I made?  ...Has my life spoken the volumes I know Mom and Dad's did? 

I share these thoughts, not to hear affirmation. not to be told what people think of me. Just to be honest. With myself, I suppose. 

I want to live a life as full as they did.  I want to have an impact on as many people as they did. I want people to know me for the person Christ molds me into, and not the fears and insecurities Satan hurls at me. In fact, I don't want people to see me at all.  I want them to see Christ. 

And that means making some changes. some sacrifices. It means letting go of me and holding onto God. 

 ...I tend to share my deep, put together thoughts on here, but I promise I'm still a work in progress!  Trust me, I'm as messy as the room I sit in (and that's bad! ask my sisters, hehe). 

Pride has always been something I struggle with.  Pride and wanting to have a reason to be proud. to be flawless and beautiful and talented. to have other people like me. to be admired when I'm seen. 

I confuse myself!  I'm sure glad God knows what He's seeing when He looks at me, cuz I have nooo idea!! For example, I love serving people, but are my motives pure?  Do I serve because that's what Christ did and because the people I'm serving are worthy of it, or do I serve to be seen and have people know how much I enjoy serving? to have them think I'm just wonderful?  I think it depends on the day....

I don't think I'm the only one who thinks and feels this way.  I just get so impatient sometimes! And lazy.  I want my heart to be pure and blameless, but do I really take time to check out the dark corners and give things over to God?  Not often enough.  Am I brave enough to hear the things I need to work on?  Rarely.  When the things tripping me up are exposed, do I focus on getting rid of the obstacle or blazing a new trail so they're not an issue?  Eh, on occasion...for a day or so...maybe.  See. I'm more pathetic than I care to admit. 

I will admit that blogging is kind of scary.  What if people don't like what they read? or they think less of me after they read it?  ...But there I go again, looking for my value and worth in the approval of other people. 

Cuz what if my writing has the opposite effect? What if it gives hope to another young lady struggling with letting go of the world's expectations and figuring out instead what it is God wants her to be?  What if it gets other people thinking and chosing to make changes in their own lives?  What if exposing a bit of my heart lets one other person know that God is still on their side, and so they join the family of believers and find the love God so desperately wants to give them?  What if me spilling my guts is exactly what someone else needs? 

Honestly, I hope most of my readers are other ladies--of all ages!--because I feel like we'll be more on the same page with all of this.  Men...well, we need them, but they're not always as understanding about these things. No offense to any guys reading this :)  And ladies, I believe we need eachother.  Nothing beats sharing your heart with other women who can comfort and encourage and share wisdom!  I wish more of us had older ladies in our lives who we weren't afraid to fall apart in front of.  I wish more of us reached out to the younger ladies in our lives who just need a friend.  I wish we took time to slow down, enjoy our favorite refreshments with another woman, and talk with "mentors" about school and sports and boys and our struggles and the things that simply make our hearts smile!  I think we would be much healthier if we did.  Even if those favorite treats have a bit too much sugar :)

  

...Anyway, I got my father's gift of going off on bunny trails :) But somehow it all ties together.  This one being that I miss Mom and our heart to hearts, and I hope I can be the person who others feel comfortable spilling their guts to because they know I really care. just like she did.  I would love to see girls (including me!) embrace who God has created them to be, and to get there with the support of other Christ-loving women.  I want to forget about me and embrace God. And I want other young ladies to do the same. 

I want us to make an impact on everyone we come into contact with.  And I want to see us invest time and wisdom into the lives of others.  I don't want all this "independence" stuff to get in the way of leaning on the support systems God offers. 

Most of all, I want us to quit doing life on our own.  Life is exhausting that way.  God placed other people on this earth for a reason.  And above all, He gave us direct access to Himself.  He is so powerful, and yet so gentle as He handles our hearts and our deepest fears! Though giving up control is scary, it's always worth it when we give the control to the One who knows the "big picture."

The Ants go Marching On...

The ants go marching one by one...down the the ground, to get out of the rain....

I guess everyone goes through this phase at one time or another...and right now, it's my turn.  I'm feeling a bit like one of those poor little ants who kept marching, trying to get out of the rain.  But the rain doesn't wait until they're safely inside.  Each turn of the page leads to yet another adventure, another thing that keeps them marching, moving forward, as they try to deal with life's storm. Time simply won't stop--not even for a little bit, no matter how badly they want it to.  And that poor little guy in the back...it doesn't matter how they march--2 by 2 or 8 by 8--something else always comes up.  Being the smallest, I'm sure he's got to work twice as hard to keep up--trust me, I know about that! :)  And if we've got anything else in common, he's probably been wishing for quite some time that he was safe in the ant hill. -Finally able to sit and relax. to breath and figure out what's going on in life.  But still, a steady drizzle and the unexpected loom around the bend. 

Now don't get me wrong.  Some of the distractions are fun! Like the "jump and jive" part. Those moments of laughter are like an umbrella, able to keep us dry for a bit, even if the sound of rain above never completely lets us break free.  But other times, the everyday moments of life trip us up. Sometimes I find myself tying shoes to avoid loose ends and tripping when I'm not expecting it.  Other times I'm left picking up sticks--moving the junk so other people see a nice, pretty yard when they look at me.  Often, those "sticks" make it no farther than to a pile in the back yard to be dealt with later.  And so, the pile keeps growing.  And eventually, it spills over into an entry like this one, exposing everything that's been buried for so long.  Making public the frustrations that only a few people have heard about.

I suppose blogging like this is my way of sorting out the sticks--the emotions and struggles that clutter things up.  My time to figure out which things I can hold onto for later, knowing they will someday bring joy, and which things I need to let go of.  Which sticks can be used for roasting marshmallows and which need to go straight to the burn pile, if you will!

When I stop and look at life right now, it's crazy!  I suppose that's what makes me feel like one of those ants, wishing I could just stop time while the storm passed. But life's really not that bad.  The force of losing Mom and Dad has lessened from a raging hurricane to more occasional scattered thunderstorms.  The sun stays out longer, and I'm learning to carry some sort of umbrella to block out or lessen the effect of the unexpected storms, as they do still come.  I suppose they always will.  But as with the clouds that must eventually let go, unable to hold another drop, I'm finding those times of letting go bring a sense of relief and refreshment, softening my heart so good things can grow. 

...Whether all those metaphors make sense or not, I'm not sure.  If not, I suppose you can join me in the confusion that life brings.  Just when I think I've got it figured out, I'm reminded how out of my control life really is. But now, I'll talk in plain English to give you an idea of some of the adventures--the good ones :) --that life has handed us over the past few months since I last wrote.  ...Brace yourself or feel free to skim--a lot has happened! :)

I survived the National Honor Society banquet, break-down-free!  ...I came close to losing it for a while after the time of honoring Mom and Dad, but managed to pull it together.  Below is me and my "most influential teacher."  -A wonderful lady who taught me about life, both in her biology classes and the way she lives day to day.

Next came a trip to the big city--New York City to be exact! The adventure began with a care package from my wonderful cousin, Debbie, and her four boys.  It was filled with lots of yummy food and a precious note to help get us through the looooong bus ride.

The following few days were filled with sight seeing, a bit of performing (it was a choir trip, after all), and more food!

...We experienced the crazy traffic (I definitely prefer a tractor slowing things down to a NYC traffic jam!) ...

...tossed pennies into a fountain just so we could say we had :) ...

...saw the Broadway show, Wicked!!...

...and so much more! (haha, I sound like a commercial now :) ) Over the course of this trip, we also lived on sleep deprivation, bargained in China Town, saw Ellis Island, and did a variety of other tourist-y things.

The next big thing to get through was Easter.  While not having Mom and Dad there just didn't seem right, we still managed to have some fun with riding around on the 4-wheeler and an Easter egg hunt...

After that came prom!! 

...Carrie and I got to get our nails done--a new and very fun experience for us! ...

...and that Saturday, Debbie joined me with a "strawberry daiquiri" as I got my hair done by the lovely Mrs. Seward...

...after spending some time with the girls at a friends a friend's house, I returned to my house and finished getting ready...with a little help from my cousin who wanted to get fancy with me :) ...

...and theeeen, my date showed up looking all handsome in his tux :)  Once I FINALLY got his boutonniere pinned on (with a little help), we couldn't pass the opportunity to take pictures with some dandelions! We had joked about having them as our corsage and boutonniere because they were yellow like my dress :) ...

...after that, we enjoyed a meal our parents had prepared for us, and then took part in the Grand March! (I'm told I walked too fast, but hey, they had plenty of time to see us all dressed up :) ) ...

The theme for the evening was "Into the Ocean" and I suppose this would be an appropriate time to mention that the Monday before prom, my date and I jumped into the official world of dating! :) Since then, we have just enjoyed getting to know each other.  "Dates" are usually hanging out at one of our houses, talking, learning about the other's childhood pass-times, cooking dinner over a fire--even when it rains!--and watching family "classics."

...We've also enjoyed an evening bowling on a triple date :) ...

Other things filled our days before the end of school,  such as going to Dan Gable's house with the Mid-Prairie wrestling team and enjoying a meal by their pool side.  This awesome opportunity was set up for us during the benefit auction that was held for our family...

...and my spare minutes were spent with charcoal all over my fingers as I finished putting together my AP Art portfolio. While my favorite 5 pieces were sent off to the college board to be evaluated, these are a few I displayed at my graduation party...

...At last, the final day of my high school career rolled around!!  I signed out for the last time ever...

...and Carrie and Hannah and I sent out the year quite well! We enjoyed spending the night in a cabin and using the row boat to catch bull frogs! ...After we squished some spiders that were crawling on the boat.  That's what's going on in the boat picture :) ...

...We then had a week or so to get ready for our graduation party.  Family came in from out of town, and the mix of getting ready for our own party while trying to sleep and make it to other parties was quite the challenge! It all came together at last. With the help of a group of wonderful ladies from church, our menu of cheese cake, chips and an assortment of dips, homemade mints, and sweet tea was a success I hear :) ...

...A "Welcome Table" that was seen when guests first came in displayed pictures of Carrie and I together as we were growing up.  I should mention for those of you who aren't as familiar with our family, Carrie is my cousin and has been my best friend as long as I can remember! ...

...we found the coolest thing online and decorated with "floating" pearls!! This picture from above doesn't show them quite as well, but it was awesome :)  ...

...And of course pictures were taken with the family--both sides...

...the next day was my official last day as a Mid-Prairie student.  Graduation had come at last!  Our seminar (same group of students, with the same teacher all four years of high school) got together one last time for a group picture around the bench they placed in front of the school in honor of Mom and Dad...

...and theeeeeennn...I GRADUATED!!!! ....

...more pictures were taken with friends and family...

...and the day was finished off with more parties. 

Whew.  If you made it all the way through that, I commend you!  Those are just the highlights, and not all of them!  Also thrown into the mix has been teaching Vacation Bible School, trying to make it to baseball games, some babysitting, and dealing with the thoughts of college and all the changes that will bring. 

As you can see, life has been a blur for quite some time now.  I suppose my break-down this afternoon may have been from finally stopping and realizing the craziness of it all.  While I obviously have moments of feeling defeated, I believe God is using this time to draw me closer to Him.  I am learning that He truly is my Strength in times of weakness.  My heart has to be reminded every day to cling to the Rock instead of the passing things of this world.  He is trying to train my mind to rest in Him and His security, even in the midst of uncertainty.  And every.day. a blessing is sent my way to assure me that I'm not forgotten.  That I am still loved and valued.  That "God is faithful. Tomorrow will be better."  And He has it all under control.  

The Truth Hurts

Our lives have seen a lot of changes the past month and a half.  With the loss of our parents, we have been forced to look into our futures with a new "normal."  College, weddings, our first homes, and having kids all take on a new light...well, most days it's still a shadow.  Or a snap shot with two very key figures cut right out of the center.  My heart still aches at these new images, and I'm sure it will for a very long time.  But that's all a ways off, and right now I have more immediate things to adjust to.

With the end of my senior year comes a lot of awesome opportunities and events, but each now comes with mixed emotions...Tomorrow night is the National Honor Society banquet in which seniors honor their parents...good practice for graduation, I suppose.  And then there's the choir trip to New York City!  I'm sure there will be pics from that one :)  And next comes prom!! to which I have a wonderful date and group of friends to share the evening with.    ...All wonderful, all events I wish I could share with Mom and Dad. 

If you're reading this, I assume it's because you want to know how we're really doing.  So here it is:  we really miss Mom and Dad.  We still laugh and enjoy life as much as possible, but right around the corner sorrow often lurks.  Today was one of those days I wanted to spill my guts out to Mom...about what exactly? I'm not sure.  But she would have listened as I sat on the kitchen counter and told her about life. That I know.  And if I had ended up crying even with the stress of Mom and Dad's passing being out of the picture...Dad would have come through the door and given me a big strong hug. kissed the top of my head. and even though the craziness of this time of year would have still been there, they would have made it all okay again. at least for a little while.  And I miss that.  A lot.

I miss seeing Mumsey's goofy side--the side she reserved for a lucky few while she was making dinner for us.  :)  Her gentle spirit and the patient wisdom that came with it. 

I miss Pops.  Being able to leave sticky notes on his computer at church. and finding them in random desk drawers years later.  The crazy adventures we had floating down rivers and picking up dog kennels on a Saturday. 

 Their love and security.  I miss knowing they'd be there for me no matter what.

I guess even though they're not physically here, they will never leave me.  The lessons and values they have instilled in me will last a lifetime.  I know what a good marriage looks like. I know the importance of an apology.  I know what it is to be human and yet strive every day to look more like my Creator.  And we have been left in very capable hands. 

Our New Beginning

My goodness life is crazy.  It's been well over a month now, and some days I feel so much less put together now than I did the day of the accident.  We've found our first four weeks each had a personality of their own. 

For those of you who've been where we're at, trying to figure out how to put life back together when every piece seems to have shattered and flown to a different, dusty corner, I hear the journey is much the same for us all.  I guess we'll see if that rings true or not. 

Week 1:  Life was a big. fat. blur. 
A crazy haze of family and friends, in and out of the house. 
Enough food to start our own soup kitchen. 
Us sisters camping out together...cuz sleeping alone? not gunna happen. 
A basketball game to attend in which our wrestlers were honored, t-shirts were worn in honor of Mom and Dad, and my little second graders had a bake sale for our family, along with other donations. 
And of course, the visitations and funeral.

Week 2:  Reality had not yet set in.
Our aunt and my dad's parents stayed with us. 
We went about our lives.
School continued.
And I went on a college visit to Liberty University with my dear cousin, Carrie! :)

(check out our facebook pages for more details on this awesome trip!! :) )

Week 3:  Reality hit.

The house got quiet.

Every minute we were there alone, it felt like Mom and Dad should come walking through the door at any moment.

Life was hard.

The world around us went on while we were stuck with our new reality.

Week 4:  Our new, temporary "normal" set in. 

For a few days, God gave us a little break.

For whatever reason, life was a bit better. 

The cloud was not as thick, and we were able to breath.

And then reality would hit. 

Tears would stream all over again, and for a while our hearts would be left broken.

The ups and downs came unexpectedly.

And they still do.  I'm not really sure what "normal" is, but we cry when we need to.  And thank the good Lord for giving us moments of laughter!

Their Legacy

(The following is a long post.  It was hard to write, and may not be fun to read, so bear with me.  If you just want the happy stuff, skip to the paragraph right before the photo.)

On February 4, 2012, life changed dramatically for this family.  The day started out normal.  Brittany was at work. Jordan was attending Acquire the Fire--a Christian youth rally.  Chase was at his wrestling tournament.  And Mick and Julie got in the car with Nicole to go watch Chase wrestle. 

It was snowing that morning, and the roads were slick.  A little too slick.  They drove on, discussing the church and family like they always did.  Laughter was shared, and everything was normal. Except for the roads.  As the three came over a hill, they hit a patch of ice I suppose, the car spun, and they went into the ditch.  Some accounts say the car flipped, but I can't be sure.  I don't remember.  ...In case you hadn't figured it out, I am the same Nicole listed as a daughter of Mick and Julie in the previous post. 

I do remember the prayer of my mother,  "Lord, help us."  I echoed her prayer, and blacked out. When I came to, things were a bit foggy, but I remember very clearly things I simply will not share with you all.  I slid myself up over the seat, onto the trunk of the car.  The back windshield was gone.  By then, some people had arrived on the scene.  They carried my up the ditch, and I sat in a stranger's truck and she held me and prayed with me as I sobbed over and over again, "God, they have to be ok.  Make them be ok!!"  Deep down, I knew they weren't.
Mom and I were taken separately to the hospital.  I was held in the emergency room for several hours while they made sure I was ok.  I was.  I came out with a minor concussion, a few bruises and scrapes, and a bit of whiplash the next day.  Other than that, I was fine.  But Mom and Dad were not.  After lying in the ER for a while, my mom's sister, Beth, came in a had to break the news.  Dad had not made it.  We cried as she told me they were still working on Mom, but the injuries she had sustained did not look good. 

After a bit, Brittany and Chase came in to see me.  We cried again as we held each other, aware and yet completely naive about the situation that would soon be our reality.  Jordan was still in Minneapolis, but was driven home and was there later that night. 

By the time they said I was free to go, we knew Mom would not make it.  She was on life support, and we had one last chance to say, "Goodbye."  But as Dad had said so many times, "For Christians it's never, 'Goodbye.'  It's just, 'See ya later.'"  So, I walked into Mom's room, held her hand one last time, and told her I'd see her in the morning as I had every night before bed for as long as I can remember. 

I was released that night and came down to the waiting room to find a good handful of people there to give us hugs and support.  Thus began our week of people in and out of the house.  Hugs.  Lots and lots of hugs and prayers!! ...Enough hugs to give my poor chin, which happens to be a bit lower than most, carpet burn!  But I didn't mind.  Each hug was a reminder of the love and peace God was surrounding us with.  There were tears of course.  And wanting to cry, only to find the well was all dried up and our minds too exhausted to grasp everything and need to cry. 

Because Mom and Dad knew so many people, we had two visitation nights.  People came from all over.  Even from Ohio where Mom and Dad were first youth pastors.  The funeral was held in the high school gym, for the church simply was not big enough.  And that building, that group of people, was as much a part of their ministry as the church had been. 



On that day, exactly one week after their death, we truly celebrated their life.  Yes, for the first time we fell apart in front of everyone, but we also worshiped our Creator along with nearly 2,000 community members.  My uncle gave the "sermon" and reminded each person that every single thing Mom and Dad did was so that they could know Jesus as their Lord and Savior.  He reminded them that not one person was at the funeral by accident.  They were there because God wanted them to be.  And as he invited people to accept Jesus Christ and His forgiveness, literally hundreds of people stood to their feet.  Students and teachers, parents and children, alike. 

In that moment, we saw why it was Mom and Dad's time to leave us and be Home.  They had done their job.  And they had done it well. 

"Mick and Julie went on the best date night of their lives. They thought they were only going to wrestling sectionals. How awesome to walk into paradise with your best friend! God is good."  This was sent to me by one of their good friends, and how true it is!!  So, while our hearts still ache, I believe Mom and Dad got the happiest of "happily ever afters," and in that, I find comfort. 

And I have no doubt they stood before the throne of the Most High and heard, "Well done, My good and faithful servants."

The Middle

After being married on what I hear was a miserably hot day, Mick and Julie officially began their lives together.  From the very beginning, the foundation of their marriage was built not on trying to please themselves or their families, trying to get ahead in careers and money, or even on putting the other first.  They knew their only hope in making their marriage last and be a blessing was to follow the Lord.  To seek and follow His plan for them. Every day. Every moment. 

Time was spent learning how to mesh two very different families.  Adjusting to the other's way of life. 

Making the choice to love one another daily.  Mick always said, "Love is a choice, not a feeling." Yes, she drove him crazy from time to time, and yes, he did the unthinkable of making her cry on occasion, but they were learning, and the Lord remained their focus.  His dreams were big, and she was the most supportive wife on the planet! So, she followed him to Ohio to be youth pastors, Iowa to train bird dogs and hunt pheasants, Maryland to create jewelry boxes and chairs, and finally back to Iowa where he would settle down and pastor a church in the small town of Kalona. 

Oh ya! ...A couple small, but rather significant facts I left out.  In that time, they also began adding to their family.  On the first move to Iowa, they had a beautiful baby girl named Brittany.  She was her daddy's little girl, with her mother's nurturing spirit and the attitude of a first-born. 

Next, while living in Maryland, was another girl, Nicole.  She was inquisitive and loved being outdoors with her father, but her mother's love for puzzles and word games came right along with the package. 

Once back in Iowa, they had a boy, entirely his father.  He grew to love hunting and hate trying to get his brain to work the way society thought it should.  Making people people laugh fueled him, and everyone wondered how he could possibly get away with as much as he did. 

Finally, there were 6, another girl completing their precious family.  She grew up under her brother's wing...or shall we say hammer?  Her grandmother's fiery spirit was evident, and her whit undeniable.  Her laughter often filled the house, and although she wouldn't admit it, her mind was as bright as the other three kids' put together. 

The children had their squabbles, but they loved one another, and each had a special bond with both their parents.  Mick was adventurous and loved treating the kids, while Julie was practical, but the best listening ear in the world!  They were both generous with their time and resources.  They were involved in everything from youth group to bible school to coaching to being on prom committee and serving as "seminar parents." 

There wasn't a lot of extra money floating around, but for good reason.  It was invested in a home not only for the 6 in the immediate family, but for everyone in the community.  Every Sunday evening, the house would fill with teenagers in the youth group.  Drinks spilled, food was dropped onto the carpet, and a few butts went through the drywall in the regular game of basketball, but they didn't really care. "A wall can be replaced much easier than a bone. We're just glad you're here having fun."  Mick had plenty of opportunities to pull out this line over the years. 

Their home was open because their minds were--to whatever situation a kid was coming from.  Their pantry was filled because their hearts were--with an Agape love that couldn't bear the thought of even one of these precious children missing out on the Lord and His salvation.  The adults in the community would say the same.  Every life they touched was marked with the finger print of God.  They knew that to love and serve Him instead of themselves was to have life to the fullest.  And they knew that this earth was not their home.